Do You Feel Safe?

I often ask myself how can I measure that whether or not I am safe. Like to check whether I have a fever I have a thermometer, to check my heart rate there is an ECG machine but how to check whether or not I am safe is still a mystery to me.

PSYCHOLOGY

5/10/20243 min read

In today's time when everyone is ultra prepped and taking conscious steps towards safety measures I often ask myself what am I doing in that aspect.

Every day we see on news channels or papers, the horrific details of women being in a situation opposite to safe in our locality either it's a mob attack, rape, teasing, domestic violence, discrimination, or misconduct of character at the workplace and we often think why didn't those women do anything? why didn't she kick that man in the balls who was trying to molest her? Right? At least that's what I think but then yesterday, a thought hit me over, what if it was me in that place, how would I react? So, I started analyzing my strengths and weaknesses for a battle that I may have to fight in the future keeping the current scenario of our society. So to begin with I don't know any martial arts, no Kung Fu action, neither taken any boxing lessons or a strong foundation of self-defense and I started freaking out. What if I couldn't match the physical strength of the others. What if the other person is equipped with a knife or gun (my imagination is a wicked witch sometimes). So I started thinking of keeping some essential items with me like pepper spray or maybe pins but then I thought what if I am wearing a dress or saree where will I keep the protection kit with me (as you know we girls don't own pockets in every dress, that's a debate for some other day) and this idea started to sound sketchy so I dropped the thought. After that, I started counting my strengths and came up with strong, bold, imperative thinking and I thought if women can bear the pain of childbirth and can go through it, then they can do anything. And come on, we can't ignore the fact that we deal with bleeding for 7 days every month and still carry on with our day-to-day task like it's nothing. No man can handle this and when I say no man I mean it (Sorry guys but that is a fact, you all make a fuss on a razor cut while shaving). Then, I realized the trick, it is me and my mind who can measure how safe I feel. I can train my mind in a way to cope up with every situation or I can sit in a corner and dwell on everything happening around me.

I realized that keeping a pepper spray or knowing martial arts will only help me when my mind is aware or ready to participate in helping me. Even if I wanted to ask for help I have to scream loud enough, for that my mind should be alert and active. What I am trying to say is you can learn all the techniques available or you can have all the protection kits the stores are offering but in the end, it is your mind that has to play the important role which will keep you alive.

So understanding your surrounding is always a must. Make sure you are always prepared with the knowledge. Because we always fear the unknown. Whenever you visit a new place have a little knowledge about it beforehand, even meeting a person for a blind date have background knowledge (don't be naïve and accept the word blind in it), be alert at public places offices, or such areas and know this you can handle everything. Worst come worst murder in self-defense is still debatable. Right? Just kidding. Don't take the last line seriously. But please take care of yourself and learn something every day to gain a new strength that can fill you with confidence.

- Taheera Ahmed

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